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Meet the Contestants for Season 25!
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For this season, the two teams were separated on the basis of their self-worth. Team Flatus is comprised of losers, whiners, dorks and losers; all creatures with no self-worth whatsoever, and if they do have any, they certainly don't deserve to.
What a bunch of losers. Makes me sick just to write this copy.
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 Cara
Hometown: San Francisco CA
Occupation: Law student
Age: 22
This smart young lady may find her LSAT scores aren't much help during the "Name Seven Famous Hookers" contest, but her competitive spirit and kind nature might let her survive for at least a few hours.
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 Charley
Hometown: Carlinville IL
Occupation: Ice Cream Truck Operator
Age: 23
No one ever said that driving an ice cream truck was a good job ... but maybe it will prepare Charley for what awaits him on Pariah Island. No... hold on... no, it won't. |
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 Kim
Hometown: Philadelphia PA
Occupation: Right Wing Blogger
Age: 25
Possibly the most famous of the contestants, Kim is regularly seen on The Network's conservative cable news program, "In Your Face, America" and is the author of "Holocaust 2.0: Making the Case for Burning Dark People". |
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 Black Don
Hometown: Los Angeles CA
Occupation: Political Activist
Age: 26
Capitalism takes a hit to the kneecaps with the addition of Black Don to the competition. This radical, leftist, moonbat, lunatic, whackjob may be a radical, leftist, moonbat, lunatic, whackjob, but he's also a great guy. |
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 Danny
Hometown: New York NY
Occupation: Muslim
Age: 25
Danny is an intelligent, well-heeled Harvard grad who hides a dark secret - he looks an awful lot like a Muslim. In fact, he is a Muslim. Wow, that takes balls. |
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 Randall
Hometown: Beachwood CA
Occupation: Computer Nerd
Age: 22
Introverted, quiet, nervous, suspicious, paranoid -- these are Randall's best qualities. We'd list his worse qualities, but are pretty sure they're the same. |
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 Leonard
Hometown: Seattle WA
Occupation: Nudist Chef
Age: 35
Erudite, genteel - these are some of the words people use to describe Leonard. That is, after they use words like "nude", "naked" and "doesn't bother to wear clothes." But he makes one helluva creme brulee. |
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 Wendy
Hometown: Trenton NJ
Occupation: Goth Chick
Age: 18
She's cute, but she's Emo, so you know what that means: you can't say a thing to this damn chick without her either rolling her eyes or bursting into tears. |
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 Corinne
Hometown: Houston TX
Occupation: Homemaker
Age: 43
Corinne is never alone. You see,not only does this middle-aged homemaker enjoy the company of a large family, she's also blessed with more than two dozen separate personalities. We can't wait to meet them! |
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